Nothing To Be Ashamed Of

It is not easy to convey with printed words just how curious and/or amusing and/or awful a borrowed English word sounds when it appears in spoken Spanish. The borrowed word will just rear up out of nowhere, blatant and unashamed, a kind of linguistic fart:

“Mirando la tele, se aprecia el marketing de tantos productos. Durante el verano puedes ver en los anuncios los bañadores sexy todas las cosas fashion para la playa.”

“Después del show de música country, vamos a un trendy por el centro, y después del trendy, vamos a un after en casa de Julio.”

“Queremos tener un fin de semana de relax, así que pensamos en visitar un camping o quizás algo mas jet, como un lifting facial en un centro de relax.”

Presumably it sounds just as curious and/or amusing and/or awful to a native Spanish speaker when an American orders a Corona, talks up a Cinco de Mayo keg party, or cheers for the Denver Broncos. For that matter, the American pronunciation of however many state names—Colorado, Florida, Montana, etc.—and however many city names—Los Angeles, Boca Raton, San Luis Obispo, etc.—has probably baffled and/or entertained more than a few native Spanish speakers. And while we’re at it…imagine a French person´s chagrin and/or amusement at the pronunciation an American will give to having champagne and hors d’oeuvres on the boulevard to celebrate a premier.

Don’t worry. Linguistic flatulence is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s a natural part of human life. Everybody does it. Anybody who tells you otherwise is loco.

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Charlie Geer is the author of the novel “Outbound: The Curious Secession of Latter-Day Charleston.” His work has appeared in Tin House, The Sun, Bloomsbury Magazine, and The Southern Review.